Slacktory

tumblr gold required

Tumblr is known for its insular culture, hatred of outsiders and “nerds”, and love of dark irony. The slang of Tumblr largely centers on reactions to others’ content, especially negative ones.

Knowing these terms is essential to “breaking in” to Tumblr, as otherwise a new user will be swiftly ejected from the online society. Playing “by the rules” is a must in this monocultural community.

What is air?: A response signaling extreme emotion or appreciation. The implication is that the subject of the reply is so amazing, the reader can’t remember merely “great” things like the French electropop band Air. The first person to ask it was Photoshopped into an advice meme:

GPOY: An extreme corruption of “get out of here,” with an implied Elaine-shove, expressing angry disbelief. Possibly began as a mockery of 4chan’s speech patterns during the “4chumblr” era.

4chumblr: A war between Tumblr and 4chan, initiated by 4channers who petitioned Tumblr to buy the site. Tumblr users revolted, hurling racial and homophobic slurs at the 4chan users. 4channers partly won over Tumblr by creating charming anthropomorphized cartoons of both sites “hugging” and sometimes engaged in sexual congress. But the deal did not go through, and 4chan was purchased by Reddit and immediately shut down.

OTP: Over This Post, a negative reaction reserved for posts that have been reblogged to death until the user has seen them in the dashboard on three consecutive days.

I’m dying: A formerly popular pro-ana blog that was forcibly moved to Pinterest.

Pro-ana: A blog movement. Originally named “anti-Ask Me Anything” or “anti-AMA”, it was renamed to “pro-Ask No-one Anything” to sound positive and thus gain more Tumblr support.

Tumblr support: A team of fulltime Tumblr staff dedicated to answering questions about Missing E.

Missing E: A Tumblr Gold feature.

I can’t even: The most-submitted complaint to TrueOCD.tumblr.com‘s Ask box, despite the editor’s repeated assurances that “making things even” is a natural tic shared by many people not afflicted with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder.

Tumblarity: A Tumblr Gold feature.

Homestuck: A fictional webcomic that doesn’t exist, but is constantly referred to as if it did, as a forced inside joke among younger Tumblr users. The subject of many “ships”.

ship: A fan-fiction subgenre where characters behave more realistically, taking fewer chances and living lives more like a real-world civilian’s. “Shippers” feel that modern entertainment like Doctor Who and Community, while artistically impressive, have gotten “too extravagant” and would work better as traditional three-camera sitcoms.

I know that feel: A more elaborate form of “dat ass”.

Creamsicle: A NSFW/trigger warning for brutal gore and hardcore pornography.

SMH: So Much Hugs, an expression of empathy.

hnng: It is still unknown what this tag means, as every blogger to use it has disappeared mid-post. It is unknown if the tag is a symptom or cause of the disappearances.

;alksjdf;lksfd: When a Tumblr user sneezes while posting, he or she records the sneeze typographically by slamming on the keyboard, as if to brag about their dedication to the process. Frequent “;kajshdf;lkjwef” posts signify how much of the user’s time is spent on Tumblr, as well as marking the user as a “asdf-face” — someone who refuses to wipe their nose until the post underway is completed (and in some extreme cases, until the post has been featured on a tag page).

Please be careful using the terms above on Tumblr, as the slightest misuse can get a user permabanned. This is not a site for sensitive people.

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  • Anonymous

    A lot of this is crap. It isn’t true.
    Look! Homestuck- http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6

    • Merlin

      None of it is. It is meant to be poked fun at. – Someone who have used Tumblr for more than 3 years.

  • Rob Brooks

    GPOY means gratuitous picture of yourself. Google it.

    • http://toomuchnick.com Nick

      I Googled it, and you’re trying to trick me! It means “Gonna poop on you”! Really immature of you to try to make me say something dirty.

  • yer

    2 comments and people aren’t getting thejoke oh dear

  • ya

    oh my god you guys

  • vidgirl8

    Ok so this IS a joke right? Because if it isn’t you’ve posted the WRONG definitions for these terms.

    • http://toomuchnick.com Nick

      Wait, what? No, these are definitely correct! I think you’ve made a “gotten on the radar”, which means “looked for errors where there are only facts.”

  • Lewis

    these comments

  • http://toomuchnick.com Nick

    List more Tumblr terms below and I’ll define them for you!

    • Maddy C

      how does one become classified as a tumblr celebrity? is there some initiation ritual?

      • http://toomuchnick.com Nick

        Hahaha, of course not! What a stupid question! There’s DEFINITELY NOT AN INITIATION Rwhat? Haha that’s a BATHROBE Maddy. I’m wearing a bathrobe. Like a normal adult. It has a hood that I can dry my hair with and a knife for cutting myself loose if my belt gets tangled in something and there’s a fire.

        Hahaha Maddy no that goat is just a pet, of my neighbor’s, that I am taking care of while he is out of town. Hello happy friendly goat!

        Maddy do you know who drew that star on the floor because it wasn’t me, OBVIOUSLY I have no reason to draw stars on the floor, you must have done it, please clean it up, oh nevermind, I’ll get it later, no NO DON’T SCRUB IT haha sorry I’m just nervous I guess because you’re drawing things in my house and then removing them and I’m all confused haha!

        No, there’s no ritual.

  • Chris

    shipping is not a desire to make sitcoms out of dramas. it’s about writing fiction as if two male characters were tied to the floor of a sinking ship and what their last words to each other would be as they plunged into a frigid watery doom. please do your research.

    thanks.

  • laurenonizzle

    Hahahahahahahaha. YES.

  • Jewel Jones

    Actually, GPOY is Gratuitous (Internet) Picture of Yourself.

  • sintervention

    :ooooooooooooooooooooooo these r so write!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! totesz accurate ok

  • Matías

    yeah well, you’re mocking 4chan and this whole post is a blatant copy of 4chan folk. the whole “requieres tumblr gold account” is beyond pathetic. i guess you spent the whole summer indoors and just discovered /b/, nicky boy. before you even grew pubes and stumbled upon the board, well, in fact, before there even was a 4chan, there was a “meme” (word didn’t even exist either) we used in the SA forums to refer to people posting things like you. name’s jeff k, look it up. cheers.

  • allison

    There is literally no way that this isn’t a joke. I mean… it has to be. No one’s that stupid.

  • naff

    thank for the infos, just made a tumblr f4f?

    • http://toomuchnick.com Nick

      Ew, no, I will not “fannie for fannie” and it’s super-gross that you Tumblr users call butts “fannies”.

  • tumblr user

    the comments. what is air? xDD

  • http://www.facebook.com/ptwnstargazer Karl Metz

    GPOY is Gratuitous Picture of Yourself

  • August

    Proud to say that it didn’t take me long to get what was really goin on :) (I see what you did there ;)

  • Jo

    Either this is a Tumblr user trying to fool the outside world or one really Tumblr-ignorant Facebook user.

  • tumblr userr

    this is all wrong, i cant.

  • dave

    this is disrespectful to tumblr and i find it border line racism

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