- Rebooted it
- Unplugged it
- Debugged it
- Checked the green light
- Checked the red light
- Hid it from the Dock
- Logged out
- Logged in
- Googled it
- Quora’d it
- Stack Exchanged it
- Exchanged it at Best Buy
- Bought a new one
- Upgraded the old one
- Used a coupon
- Used a Groupon
- Checked for updates
- Checked for viruses
- Checked the box
- Checked the power cord
- Checked in
- CHKDSKed
- Pressed alt-F4
- Pressed ctrl-alt-del
- Pressed shift-cmd-esc
- Pressed the Windows button in the middle of the game
- Compiled it
- Compressed it
- Encoded it
- Technologic
- Freed up some space
- Freed up some memory
- Installed the extension
- Uninstalled the extension
- Updated Flash
- Updated Silverlight
- Opened it in Firefox
- Opened it in IE
- Opened it in Notepad
- Stole MS Word
- Stole Adobe Photoshop
- Stole seasons 1 and 2 of Game of Thrones
- Encrypted it
- Password-protected it
- Repaired permissions
- Repaired the CD-ROM drive
- Upgraded to Blu-Ray
- Changed the color scheme
- Selected “Compact”
- Turned off Messaging
- Turned off Growl
- Reversed the Tumblarity
- Backed it up
- Backed it up for real
- Backed it up on Dropbox
- Recovered Dropbox password
- Recovered deleted files
- Hotswapped it
- Cold booted it
- Held down “eject”
- Held down “increase brightness”
- Bought an amplifier
- Bought a dock
- Bought a case on Kickstarter, it’ll come this fall
- Double-clicked
- Middle-clicked
- Hit Scroll Lock
- Realized I’d hit Scroll Lock once in 2010, or was it twice, is it on or off?
- Starred everything in iTunes
- Starred everything in Spotify
- Starred everything on Twitter
- Reblogged it
- Pinned it
- Bent the actual pin
- Consulted Clippy
- Gave in and got a Mac
- Gave in and got a PC
- Used a stylus
- Used my fingers
- Used voice recognition
- Asked Siri
- Asked my nephew
- Asked the CEO
- Got it trending
- Got it Radared
- Got it upvoted
- Left a tip
- Tipped Boing Boing
- Tipped Gawker
- Tipped it on its side and drained it
- Blew the dust out
- Blew the Geek Squad
- Cleared the cache
- Cleaned the screen
- Liked it
- “Like”d it
- Licked it, got shocked
- Optimized the SEO
- Optimized the content strategy
- Optimized the load time
- Optimized the accessibility
- Optimized the MySpace angle
- Opted in
- Opted out
- Cropped it out
- Reduced redeye
- Tagged it
- Badged it
- +K’ed it
- +1′ed it
- Built up my karma
- Built up my whuffie
- Built up my Minecraft fortress
- Stat-dumped
- Memory-dumped
- Got dumped
- Felt Lucky
- Asked Jeeves
- Thumbed it up
- Thumb-drived it
- Craigslisted it
- Added a referral link
- Got pinterested
- Got kottke’d
- Used the hashtag
- Used the AOL keyword
- Got lamp
- Readied player one
- Inserted coin
- TinEyed it
- BCCed it
- Bought the domain
- Reserved the username
- Used numbers, letters and special characters
- Guessed
- Renamed it ” . “
- DELed COMMAND.SYS
- Archived it
- Archive.org’ed it
- Used WordArt
- Used KidPix
- Remote Desktopped
- Wii Remoted
- Netflixed it
- Rotten Tomatoesed it
- Added it as an IMDb goof
- Made a ticket
- Started a channel
- Started a subreddit
- Started a meetup
- Started it up
- Ran it dry
- Drained the battery
- Emptied the drive
- Unfriended it
- Hate-blogged it
- Signed a petition
- Screamed
- Smacked it
- Blended it
- Buried it
- Went outside
- Took a walk
- Forgot about it
