The recent only-pretty-great Brave and the upcoming prequel Monsters University are making some Pixar fans worry that the company is losing its way, if you totally ignore Wreck-It Ralph. We found this definitely-real list of Pixar’s planned films:
A Cash Adventure — Anthropomorphized money feels bad when it’s stockpiled by a gangster. So it plans a little “crime spree” of its own!
Wireless Plan — Sammy the Motorola flip phone falls in love with an iPhone. With the help of its Bluetooth sidekick, Sammy manages to switch from Boost Mobile to AT&T to be with its love.
Swept Away — What if cleaning supplies were actually aliens?
Dictionary — What if words were actually bugs?
New Leaf — A gang of potted plants team up to fight their cactus bullies. But they’re gonna have to break a few Plant Rules! Miranda July voices Crystal, a heroic African Violet.
Cars, But They’re Toy Cars
Sex Toy Story — Woody and the other toys explore Bonnie’s house and find her mom’s playthings. Includes a fun interlude where Buzz skates on a pool of lube, and an extended graphic sex scene involving Woody and Bo Peep, because they are two grown adults and that is nothing to be ashamed of.