Slacktory

  1. Goldman Sachs Kickstarter project

    Goldman Sachs Kickstarter project

  2. George Bluth sells protein bars

    Arrested Development: George Bluth loves prison

  3. Arrested Development boob flash

    The ultimate Arrested Development supercut

  4. Drive Deplorably banner

    Drive Deplorably with Steven Spielberg

  5. Doctor Who sonic screwdriver

    Doctor Who’s fakest websites

  6. Colonel Hunter Gathers on Venture Bros

    Venture Bros.: Best of Colonel Hunter Gathers

  7. Venture Bros villain

    Villains of the Venture Bros.

Posts Tagged “death”

  1. Nick-and-Siri-get-a-new-computer

    Nick and Siri get a new computer

    Siri considers her mortality.

    Previously: Nick and Siri make cocktails.

  2. grim reaper on subway

    Bad Ways to Discover You’re Dead

    • Reading news story about yourself that mentions Fatal Nosebleed Syndrome.
    • Memorialized on a sign towed behind a biplane along with an ad for two-for-one deal at Domino’s.
    • Hearing ballad about yourself written by Gordon Lightfoot.
    • Spending the night in a morgue; quit your mortician job months ago.

    See more ways to learn of your death. »

  3. Trinity shoots the Matrix agent

    Supercut: The Pre-Mortem One-Liner

    In the movies, the act of taking a life is best celebrated immediately before taking that life.

    We didn’t make this supercut, YouTube’s ziccup did. We just respect it deeply.

    Watch THIS. Get it? Like ‘Dodge THIS’? Watch it. »

  4. dead girl shadow puppet

    I Thought I Killed a Girl: Kyle Levenick’s Story of Childhood

    This video is from UCB, but it’s not a “wakka wakka” joke, it’s just a good story, charmingly dramatized with shadow puppets.

    It’s from a monthly UCB East series by Todd Bieber called Animated Stories. Audience members tell stories, then the best one gets animated for YouTube.

    There’s an Animated Stories show this Saturday! So that is a thing you could do if you live in New York City.

    Watch Kyle’s story about killing a girl. »

  5. I’ve been watching The X-Files, but this is what will give me nightmares: Dead cat helicopter.

    Via: Josh Greenman

  6. The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and his family watch a man die

    This “Fresh Prince of Bel-Air” Clip Is Far More Horrific Than It Wants You to Think

    The following isn’t timely; a lot of you have known it for two decades. Too bad.

    I didn’t watch much Fresh Prince so I forgot about Hilary’s boyfriend Trevor, who proposed to her while bungee-jumping on live TV, and how that turned out.

    Aggravatingly, embedding is disabled. So click and watch the video, then come back.

    Ha ha ha! What funny slapstick! He fell to the ground! Aunt Viv tries to hide it from Ashley! They keep running jokes after the accident. Comedy! Laughtrack!

    Turns out Trevor died. Cool prayers, Uncle Phil.

    While Hilary was playing dumb about the President so we could keep laughing, her boyfriend was dead. She just watched him die on live television. Later she brings back the wrong ashes from the crematorium, where he was presumably sent because his earth-buffeted body was too mangled for a proper burial.

    This is a story all about how her life got flipped, turned upside down. She’d like to take a minute, just sit right there, she’ll tell you how she became queen of a town called despair.

    Via: These Reddit comments

  7. Articles We Won’t Publish Today

    • “Best Twitter Jokes About Maurice Sendak’s Death”
  8. AAEG Evil Magician hat

    Ask an Evil Genie: I Wish I Was a Hologram Like Tupac

    The Evil Genie grants three wishes a week. Leave a wish in the comments!

    RightOne wishes: I wish I could be a hologram like Tupac.

    The Evil Genie replies: Okay, you’re a hologram, like Tupac. Here’s the thing about being careful what you wish for — sometimes we don’t even understand what we’re wishing for.

    Sometimes, when we look at a happy couple and wish that we could have what they have, we don’t know that what they have is a miserable relationship where she feels unfulfilled and leaves drunk voicemails on her ex-boyfriend’s phone and he calls her “mustache” to his friends and tells his parents not to worry about him “settling down” anytime soon. Sometimes, when we think about a dream job we wish that we could have, we don’t know that the position entails such intense commitment, focus, and hard work that all other parts of that Vice President of Accounts or Senior Consultant or Captain of the Air Hockey Team’s life are basically memories, and that the inevitable failure tied to the position has crushed the careers of much more capable employees. Sometimes, when we wish we could be a hologram like Tupac, we don’t already know that Tupac is a hologram.

    Read on: To be clear, Tupac Shakur is not dead… »

  9. 14 Inappropriately Tragic “That Moment When” GIFs

    Jesus, the “that moment when” animated GIF fad is really getting out of hand. They used to be all fun and cute, like the stories about crushes and BFFs on That’s So True or Totally-Relatable. But the kids are getting way darker! Look at this GIF story:

    And that’s the least depressing one.

    Look at these inappropriately tragic GIF stories! »

  10. Oh god why

    Reddit’s “What Secret Could Ruin Your Life if It Came Out?” Thread Is a Harrowing Descent Into the Darkest Reaches of the Human Soul

    A recent AskReddit thread titled Throwaway time! What’s your secret that could literally ruin your life if it came out? got people creating temporary accounts, then confessing their deepest, darkest secrets. The results ranged from creepy-but-cute, to fascinating, to horrifying.

    I hope to walk you through that gigantic thread, because there were so many weird confessions, and browsing the comments on Reddit is time-consuming. Consider this a highlight reel of car crashes, I guess. I’m your Virgil, guiding you through Hell and Purgatory. I’m not condoning any of this, but I’ll be damned if it wasn’t fascinating.

    Another thing about this thread: It’s uncommon to see this level of honesty anywhere. People created (relatively) anonymous accounts and dumped their secrets onto the internet for everyone to see, with many posters saying they’d never shared their secrets with anyone before. This thread was exhausting to read, and with recent research suggesting that we, as people, carry secrets not just as emotional burdens, but as physical ones as well, at least now I understand why.

    From here on out, things are about to get dark and/or gross. Don’t say we didn’t warn you. »

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