Slacktory

  1. Goldman Sachs Kickstarter project

    Goldman Sachs Kickstarter project

  2. George Bluth sells protein bars

    Arrested Development: George Bluth loves prison

  3. Arrested Development boob flash

    The ultimate Arrested Development supercut

  4. Drive Deplorably banner

    Drive Deplorably with Steven Spielberg

  5. Doctor Who sonic screwdriver

    Doctor Who’s fakest websites

  6. Colonel Hunter Gathers on Venture Bros

    Venture Bros.: Best of Colonel Hunter Gathers

  7. Venture Bros villain

    Villains of the Venture Bros.

Posts Tagged “sports”

  1. Superbowl-party

    Super Bowl party tips

    I’m no stranger to attending a party or two when Super Bowl Sunday rolls around, sometimes even when specifically invited. I’d like to share some essential pointers for pigskin party-goers that I use each year. Allow me to allow YOU to have the best time possible at the party no matter what team you’re rooting for (I usually say the Wisconsin Wieners, but then again, I’m the office cut-up, so…)

    First: note where the host’s belfry is. It is most likely the room with the highest population of bats, and you’d be very wise to steer clear of it.

    If there are women at the party, be kind and courteous and ask them if they’d care to “have the next waltz.” Don’t be a sucker and miss your chance for a smooch after the big Charleston contest they’re sure to hold during half-time!

    Read more tips for a Superbowl party that won’t ‘short stop.’ »

  2. Mighy Ducks movie vs NHL team

    The Mighty Ducks of Anaheim are nothing like the movie

    The 90s Guy is a column by a man from the 1990s.

    When I heard they were making a real NHL team based on The Mighty Ducks, I got really excited. I totally thought this was going to change everything, like how Happy Gilmore changed the sport of golf — only in real life and with hockey instead. I thought the NHL would become more fun and sarcastic and like, I don’t know, demographically diverse I guess.

    But the Mighty Ducks of Anaheim are just like any other boring NHL team. They don’t ever quack to get themselves pumped up, there seems to be little to no focus on the patented triple deke technique, and they have yet to ever skate in a flying V formation.

    If I’m watching a hockey team called the Mighty Ducks, then somebody better be using a lasso at some point. »

  3. chess boxing

    What the 2012 Summer Olympics Were Missing

    The Olympics are done! The Spice Girls ended them. Here’s what got left out in this year’s Olympics, or at least deleted by NBC:

    • Synchronized drowning
    • Representation for up-and-coming metals such as zinc, gallium, and bismuth
    • Topless beach volleyball (men’s)
    • Discus and shot-put renamed “people making hilarious faces, and also throwing things at a very high level of athleticism”
    • Pole-vaulters held accountable to the same stringent landing penalties as gymnasts
    • Usain Bolt on a rocket sled
    • Curiosity wins gold in long jump
    • Women’s and Men’s 500-meter loiter
    • Silver medalists filling out job applications to Home Depot
    • Combined shooting and fencing event called Ye Olde Warfare
    • Detailed explanation of why anyone still plays badminton
    • Video footage of NBC firing itself, set to the national anthem of Tajikistan, which took home a single bronze medal in women’s boxing
    • Several-yard dash

    Photo via Chess-Theory

  4. The Ultimate Backstory for the Ultimate Animated GIF

    I never read Progressive Boink until last week, and thus never knew that it’s like the Something Awful of sports. Just really amazing wit going on there. And so they wrote about this GIF, which is the ”Last Supper” of GIFs.

    I think my personal favorite isn’t even the guy who caught the ball, though in any other GIF, including the guy-throwing-clothes-against-the-wall GIF, that guy would be the best. My personal favorite is the old guy above him with the mashed-potatoes body, going “Fuuuuck you. Fuuuuck you.” Because you can see his tone of voice. Jesus.

    Read some of the amazing fake backstory for this GIF. »

  5. Nintendo controller t-shirts

    Sometimes I Hate Nerds

    As a nerd, sometimes I hate other nerds. Unfairly, I mean.

    Today I saw a guy with a shirt with a Nintendo controller on it and I thought “Ugh, fuck you.” AND I LIKE NINTENDO CONTROLLERS.

    Are sports guys this way? Like, if you’re really into the Packers, and some other guy has a Packers hat, are you thinking, “Ugh, fuck you, other guy who really likes the Packers,” or do you want to high five that guy? Or are you just like “what-the-fuck-ever, I’m no hat-looker”?

  6. Chris Bosh GIFbomb banner

    9 New Chris Bosh GIFbombs (And 4 Favorites)

    You’ve seen Chris Bosh videobomb his Miami Heat teammate’s post-game interview:

    Well, I Photoshopped him so he’s GIFbombing everything else.

    Come see Bosh’s other GIFbombs. »

  7. Junior Seau

    People on Twitter Making a “Junior Séance” Joke

    Former NFL linebacker Junior Seau died yesterday, apparently a suicide. Twitter made jokes. Well, Twitter made a joke. And it was just a few awful people. Whom we are now commemorating.

    Here’s something you didn’t know about and didn’t want. »

  8. Alana Shavon talks about the space shuttle

    Tragic Space Shuttle Accident: Alana Shavon, Best Serious News Reporter

    Slacktory’s very professional reporter is back, and this time she’s pretty sure she got all the details right. She talks about the recent space shuttle disaster, before throwing to Zach Footbat for sports.

    Watch Alana Shavon’s super-accurate roundup of current news. »

  9. Nate Smith plays basketball

    Nate Smith, Best Dad Ever: The Basketball Diaperies

    Nate Smith is still determined to find a career for his two-year-old son. Architecture school didn’t work, so now Nate’s grooming him for the NBA.

    Watch Nate teach jump shots and rebounds. »

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